→ . . . . VEE's WORLD . . . . ←

LAST CHANCE...

2009-05-14T23:43:00.003-06:00

by mymp.

This is my last dance with you
This is my only chance to do all I can do
To let you know that what I feel for you is real, real

This is the last chance for us
This is the moment that I just can’t end
Before I know that there’s a chance we’re more than friends

So don’t let go
Make it last all night
This is my last chance to make you mine

I kept my feelings so deep
I kept my dreams of you and me somewhere inside
Although I prayed that you would see it in my eyes, ooh

But this is my last chance to say
What’s in my heart before you stay out of my life
And then you’ll understand the way I feel inside

So hold me close cause it feels so right
This is my last chance to make it mine

Make this dream reality
So close and yet so far
Gotta find a way into your heart
Gotta speak my mind
Gotta open up to you this time
I can’t let you slip away tonight

This is my last dance with you
This is my only chance to do all I can do
To let you know that what I feel for you is so real

So don’t let go
Just make it last for all night long
This is my last chance to make you mine,
To make you mine

SURVEY for May 14th... sigh

2009-05-14T23:15:00.002-06:00

1. How many people have you kissed in the past 2 weeks?
→♥ my one and only.

2. Have you ever done anything illegal?
→♥ not yet. wait, not that i know of though. oh wait. jaywalking is illegal. so yah. LOL

3. Would you rather spend a whole day with your mom or your dad?
→♥ i'd spend more time with my mom. but i dont want to spend my "ENTIRE" day with any of them. it just doesn't feel right. haha

4. Where will you be 12 hours from now?
→♥ on my bed, just in time to wake up. :]

5. Is it easy for others to make you feel awkward?
→♥ yah duhh. ALOT actually.

6. Do you know what you are going to wear tomorrow?
→♥ nope. i just wear what i see in my closet. lol

7. Who do you wish you were with right now?
→♥ my big boo.

8. Is it easy for people to make you smile?
→♥ i smile a lot, i dont even realize it myself. lol
so i guess yah.. maybe....? but only few people can make me laugh like CRAZY! xD

9. Does anyone hate you for no reason?
→♥ hahaha. i think there should be a reason. there's always a reason behind everything no matter how people try to deny that fact.

10. Can you make yourself cry?
→♥ haha. if i want to. but it takes time. i can't act crying after being told to act very happy. man... it's so hard to be an actress. T_T

11. How many hours of sleep did you get last night?
→♥ about 9 hours... and a half. lol

12. Is your life simple or complicated?
→♥ OR

13. Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?
→♥ maybe?? just to correct some stupid things i've done in the past.

14. Have you ever been too drunk to remember anything?
→♥ no. i actually tend to be the opposite. lol

15. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed?
→♥ uhmm...... :P

16. Do you know anyone who lives in Wyoming?
→♥ people.

17. Have you ever kissed someone whose name starts with a C?
→♥ no.

18. Have you ever been out past curfew?
→♥ i never had curfew. lol so i discipline myself and
i give curfew to myself. haha

19. What are you doing tomorrow?
→♥ important stuffs.

20. Are you easily confused?
→♥ yeah. i guess. maybe... hmm.. yeah i am. lol

21. Do you think you would make a good parent?
→♥ i can't tell 'til i have my own mini versions. but i dream to become a great mom and wife someday. :]

22. What is your favorite kind of ice cream?
→♥ cookies 'n cream. and coffee crumble. yumm! and
i like chocolate-overloaded ice creams too! haha

23. What was your last place of employment?
→♥ Micron. i got a pretty decent pay right there.

24. Are you taller than 5 foot 4 inches?
→♥ LOL. xD

25. Have you ever liked someone who treated you like crap?
→♥ not that i can remember. oooh! i remember! haha. with my 2nd crush. lol he totally ignored me coz i was an ugly duckling. T_T (i think)

26. Is your current hair color your natural hair color?
→♥ yeah. :) growing.

27. What color are your socks?
→♥ im barefoot right now.

28. Has anyone ever borrowed something from you and never returned it?
→♥ YAH!!! like A LOT OF THEM! most specifically my former classmate MAT who borrowed my precious expensive badminton set that i used to have for a few days after i got it. lent it to him and he lost it. uuugggghhh!!! i'm still not over my loss. that was so precious to me. i didnt even get to say goodbye.....T_T

29. Do you fall for people easily?
→♥ no. but when i do, i fall deep. that's the best part of loving: FALLING INTO IT. :]

30. True or False: Everything happens for a reason.
→♥ my opinion: TRUE. whether bad or good CHOICES. there's a reason. a reason from bad experiences is to LEARN from them. and from the good, it's to move us another step ahead to new challenges. God didnt plan our choices but HE gave us free will to choose....... the longer way or the short cut.

31. Have you ever dated someone more than once?
→♥ by saying dating one guy more than once??? yah. :))

32. Who have you texted today?
→♥ no one. i'm just not in the mood right now. and i just leave my phone everywhere.

33. When and what was the reason behind the last time you cried?
→♥ A LOT OF THINGS. josh. missing josh. and some things that happen personally and spiritually that only God knows. not even my parents know about.

34. Have you ever liked anyone on your myspace?
→♥ my NUMBAH 1 GUY!. :D

35. Do you find members of the opposite sex confusing?
→♥ A LOT. i don't really understand men. i used to say, they're all the same. but now, i'm thinking twice.....

36. Is there anybody you wish you could be with right now?
→♥ i think ive answered this one already. (dejavu question.lol)

37. When is the last time you saw a big group of friends?
→♥ hmmm.... only @ church. :] Sunday, Tuesday, and Saturday.

38. What are you listening to right now?
→♥ Last Chance by MYMP.

♫♫"This is my only chance to do all I can do
To let you know that what I feel for you is so real
So don’t let go
Just make it last all night long
This is my last chance to make you mine" ♫♥

39. How has the week been?
→♥ contented. :] not happy, but i'm still thankful to God for the days that passed and more to come........ i'm contented. :]

40. Is there something you wish you could tell someone but you cant?
→♥ it's gonna be our SECOND MONTHSARY TOMORROW.......
and you're not here to celebrate it with me......*sigh* :'(

.

51 Questions about JOSH.

2009-05-13T12:14:00.003-06:00

1) What’s their name?
→♥ Josh.

2) Does he or she have a boyfriend/girlfriend??
→♥ not that i know of other than me.

3)Do you get along with this person all the time?
→♥ yupp.

4) How old is the person?
→♥ turning 20 next month.

5) Has he/she ever cooked for you?
→♥ not yet.

6) Is this person older than you?
→♥ 6 months older. :]

7) Have you ever kissed this person?
→♥ yeah.

9) Are you related to this person?
→♥ he's my man.

10) Are you really close to him/her?
→♥ yes. :]

11) Nickname?
→♥ my panda baby, my boo .

13) How many times do you talk to this person in a week?
→♥ it used to be everyday . now i'll have to wait through snail mail .

14) Do you think they will repost this?
→♥ no.

15) Could you live with this person?
→♥ if God wills, yes. :]

16) Why is this person your number 1?
→♥ coz he's the love of my life. <3>

18) How long have you known this person??
→♥ uhmmm. enough months to get to know him well, in and out. :]

19) Have you ever been to the mall with this person?
→♥ haha yeah. he drives me there. :]

20) Have you ever had a sleepover with this person?
→♥ uhmm yah. :]

21) If you ever moved away would you miss this person?
→♥ of course! what a question .

23) Have you ever done something really stupid or illegal with this person?
→♥ haha. lots! just not illegal. :P

24) Do you know everything about this person?
→♥ i'd lie if i say everything. i know most about him, but not all. :]

25) Would you date this person’s siblings?
→♥ hahaha. no. hang out, i'd rather say. :] he has only one sister.

26) Have you ever made something with this person?
→♥ i might cook for him.... but i haven't really made something special for him.

29) Have you gone skinny dipping with this person?
→♥ no .

31) Is your #1 on drugs?
→♥ haha. no .

33) Have you ever worn this person’s clothes?
→♥ no . haha. he only has a few clothes. lol

34) Have you and your #1 person made up a hand shake?
→♥ kind of. haha it's dumb, but very cute. :P

35) If it was “freaky friday” would you switch bodies with this person?
→♥ no way! hahaha

36) Have you ever heard this person sing?
→♥ not really. i tried to make him sing, it's quite hard. but he heard me sing. lol

38) Do you and this person have a saying?
→♥ i dont think so.

39) Do you know this persons myspace password?
→♥ uhmmmm.... hihi. :P

41) Have you and this person ever gotten into a fight that lasted more than 2 months?
→♥ no. . our fights only lasted a few minutes. :P

44.) Have you and this person gone clubbing?
→♥ no. we could if we want to, but we're not really into the club scene.

45) Do you know how to make this person feel happy?
→♥ yah. haha. he's like a baby, he's happy and contented with the simplest of things that i do for him. :]

46) Do you and this person talk alot?
→♥ haha ALOT! but that was before he left.

47) Do you like this person?
→♥ no.... I LOVE HIM. <3

48) Has this person yelled at you?
→♥ not really. but one time yah. but he says sorry afterwards. and we were just giggling. :P

49) Have you and this person got into a fist fight?
→♥ just minor ones. lol coz he knows he'll lose. haha

50) Do you want to go out with this person??
→♥ we are actually...

51) Do you want to be friends with them forever?
→♥ i want him to be my lover, my bestfriend, and my partner in life., :]

things i missed about josh...

2009-05-13T11:51:00.006-06:00

his hazel green eyes that i love to stare deep into.
his manly voice that i love to hear.
his face that i can't seem to forget.
the way he laughs at simple things.
when he jokes around me and makes me laugh.
the way he talks a lot, talking about random things. [it makes me smile. :) ]
when we cruise around town.
when we eat asian food.
when we walk in the park.
when he gives me piggyback rides when i'm on heels.
his very warm hugs.
our cuddle moments.
the serious look on his face.
the way he drives: his hand on the steering wheel, the other, on my hand.
the way he kisses me.
when we watch movies.
the way he kneels down infront of me.
that time when he took care of me when i was sick.
wen he kissed me when i was sleeping.
when he taught me the word "fiddlesticks" as an expression.
the way he holds my hand.
the way he holds me by my waist.
those moments when we just laugh so hard, together.
the way he massages my feet.
when we play thumb wrestling.
when we play pretend-boxing.
when he lets me sit on his lap.

to be continued.....

stuffs running on my mind...

2009-05-13T00:24:00.004-06:00

it's May 13, 2009 wednesday 12:25am, and i just can't sleep i guess. i have a lot of things running on my mind. first off, Josh. he just never gets tired of running on my mind. my man enlisted and basically signed his life to the Marine Corps. he was shipped for bootcamp last monday, May 11th, 2009 and we bid him goodbye before he flew off to the Marine Corps Bootcamp in San Diego, California. it was all okay for me until i lost sight of him. and left the airport. i went home...went to my room. turned on my laptop and looked at our photos together. and all of a sudden, tears fell down my eyes.... "tears.. why won't you stop falling?!! stop it!!" and i just bursted into tears. i just felt awful. i have never cried for a guy this much in my entire life. it's funny how people who really mean so much to you reveal your weaknesses. well josh has done a great impact in my life. and i can NEVER DENY how great a man he is. i just missed him. and just thinking about not being able to see his face, hear his voice, hear him laugh, listen to him joke around, or not even receive a letter from him for a long time feels different. so clearly stating, he is very dear to my heart, and i miss him so much. makes me realize that his ABSENCE make me grow even fonder and fonder of him. *sigh*. i think i should think of him less now. starting today. keeping myself busy makes the days shorter. and the months, fewer. :]

secondly, my dad's illness. he has prostate cancer. i dont know if he knows that i knew about it already, but mom told me about it and she told me not to make things obvious that i know it already. she told me to pretend not to know. so i cant even talk to my dad or make a good conversation with him without thinking about his illness.... :( but i'm much more worried about his surgery. i keep praying that everything will be fine after that. he's gonna have his surgery done at the end of May. i just pray that everything goes well for him and that God will totally protect him and preserve his life. declaring this, I BELIEVE SO.

third, i dont have a job. and i have so many plans for my life and for my summer. i am still praying for a job. God is a provider. and i believe that a job is waiting for me out there. because the Lord has great and amazing plans for my life. and He is actually waiting for me to grab my opportunities while they're still sizzling hot and fresh.

fourth, i have extraordinary visions that i'm kinda scared of accepting or dealing with. i dont want to consider it a gift or a curse. it's even too personal to say it here coz still, no one will understand what im going through. but to give a hint, it's all about spiritual warfare. i have to be strong enough to deal with it, which i'm honestly not. and it all started from the very day i committed my life to the Lord.

my experiences had been very scary ever since. i could have died before. but for sure, the Lord has protected me.and i am very thankful to God for that. [Lord! thank you so much!]

so on May 11th, i cried in my room after my josh left. on May 12th, i bursted into tears for the same reason still kind of. but not just because of that, but also because of fear stirring in my heart. i wasn't able to hold myself back when someone asked what was going on with me. so i began to cry and told my friend in church what was going on. i cried in front of her and in front of them and it was totally embarrassing. they prayed for me afterwards and my small group leader wrote and sang me a song. i appreciated it a lot. i forgot how to cry now. :]

P.S. i'm really tired now. to be continued.... -_-

→ . . . . VEE's WORLD . . . . ←

LAST CHANCE...

SURVEY for May 14th... *sigh*

51 Questions about JOSH.

things i missed about josh...

stuffs running on my mind...

SURVEY for May 14th... sigh